SMILES AND TEARS

Hello Kast Family,

It’s been kind of a crazy couple of weeks…….many things have been going on, Jenn here and gone, me starting my new job on a regular basis, adjustments, memories, sunflowers, butterflys…….on and on.

Two weeks ago today Jenn, Ron and his family, Steve and Joyce and Grandma Andree met at the cemetary to visit with Kerrie and remember where we all were one year ago. Her uncle, Fr. Dan was there and he led a very meaningful service, with many prayers for Kerrie. It was an emotional time for all of us. Just after 3:30 we all paused and had some time of reflection. Her dad and Joyce, her brother, Jenn and I were with her in the hosptial. None of us will ever forget that moment when we knew she was gone, no more pain, no more suffering, but gone from us. I can’t begin to explain how it feels, but I’m sure any of you who have experienced this can understand.

After the service it was time for one final gesture. I wanted to share the experience of the balloon launch with the family. Jenn and I had gotten a big bunch of helium balloons and secured them by tying them to a crate and another post that would set into the ground. We managed to get them to the cemetary and set them by her headstone. The wind was pretty brisk and they bounced around a lot. We told everyone what we were going to do and had some readings and some very beautiful music that went right along with our intentions. We all had little butterflys that we wrote messages on, to Kerrie and to some other loved ones (Ker’s Grandpa Andree who is right next to Kerrie) and tied them to the balloons and prepared for the launch. Unfortunately, the balloon ribbons had become very tangled and we had a time getting them apart, cutting many just to get them free.

We then listened to a song “Beautiful balloons” written specially for this occasion. We let our balloons go and watched them ……..sink….. It seems when they bat around so much they lose some air and then you tie a little weight to them and they don’t work so well……but then the wind caught one or two of them and then another and another and the one that had caught in a tree worked free……..and the one that popped didn’t have a message on it! One by one we watched some of them go up and others float across the field toward a stand of tall pine trees. I could feel my heart sinking…..the last few were going to be caught in the trees……….but all of a sudden the balloons lifted straight up and over the trees and in to the sky…..then Ker’s dad rescued one lone drifter and they were all launched!

I was feeling so disappointed that the launch had not gone off as well as the one with the support group and that the balloons were scattered……..that is until I saw those few lift up so suddenly and go over the trees…..and I knew Ker was there gathering her balloons and taking them with her 🙂 ….. so I’m sure she got them all right………… I know she did.

Many more things took place during the week….. I hope when Jenn gets home in a few days and has some time she can tell you more….

Until the next time…. take care Kast Family…….and watch the gallery….. I have sunflowers ready to bloom…. I will post some pictures.

Love you all
Joan