Friday, August 3rd
I’m sure everyone in my family was looking at the clock, at 3:30pm, and trying to hold back the tears. It doesn’t seem like it’s been a week already.
I know there are many people still checking the site, but it’s been difficult to post the last few days. As I left Michigan, yesterday, I couldn’t leave without stopping to say good bye to Kerrie. The flowers from the day before had already been cleared away, so I made sure she had some new ones. It was so hard to drive away.. I kept hearing my heart screaming to me that she was saying “dont’ leave me alone…” Mom says she was really saying “You need to go home..” I hope Mom was right.
I was looking over some of the early posts the other day and saw something a little uncanny in the dates of things that have happened. Kerrie always did have an unusual way of doing things..
July 13, 2006 Kerrie is given her initial diagnosis   Â
July 13, 2007Â We are told the Luekemia is back in full force and they are not sure what can be done
July 26, 2006 We are given the news that I am a donor match and Kerrie will be able to receive a treatment
July 26, 2007Â Kerrie is told further treatment isn’t going towork and treatment is stopped.
July 31, 2006 Kerrie and Mom pack her most precious things to take with her to Henry Ford
July 31, 2007 Mom and I pack Kerrie’s most precious things to take to Elton Black & Son
August 1 2006Â Kerrie moves into her new home at Henry Ford
August 1 2007Â Kerrie is taken to her new home at Holy Sepulchre
 I had to stop reading at that point. I think it’s too early for me to read through those posts again. We sounded so full of hope, we sounded happy… we sounded confident.  Now we feel so lost…
I know many people feel the same way we do, and have been checking the site often to look for anything new. Please don’t give up on us. We have a lot of things we would like to do with this page, but it’s been difficult to bring myself to log on.. and I know it’s been hard for Mom too.
 We will….
17 Comments
Texas Pam
Jenn,
You are going to be OK, everyday it will get a little better. I do check this website everyday along with many of my fellow friends and people I work with at school, South Keller Intermediate. They never met Kerrie, but this website meant so much to them as well. Jenn your posts inspired me, I think you should truly look into getting this published. It would give so much hope and peace to people going thru the same experience. You are wonderful sister, and Kerrie loves you very much. I think it’s important we all keep in touch and keep this website updated as a tribute to sweet Kerrie. Post when you can, when you and Joan are ready, the KAST family will be here and waiting…
Love, Pam
Cousin Mandy
Just to let you know Jenn and Aunt Joan I am always thinking about you guys. You are not far from thoughts on a daily basis. I know that this is hard and there are no words that can be said to make it easier for either of you. I do want you to know that I love you both and I am checking the site everyday just to see if there is an update on you guys. I just want to let you know I am here and always thinking of you. Mandy
Michelle
Jenn & Joan- We’re not going anywhere. Take all the time you need.
Lots of love to you both.
Cousin Kathy
Jenn,
I am here as well. I love you and your Mom very much. Anytime you need ANYTHING, please call. Kerrie’s memory will live on in all of us. She is the example to follow in life. She embraced it and lived it even with all the stuff she had to endure. Take care,
Love,
Kathy
heather (anderson)
Take your time,we will be waiting patiently and we will never leave you!
Ron
will never give up on you guys just as any of us never gave up on kerrie, there are no words or actions that can help to releve the pain of loosing a sister or a daughter. and nothing to compair to that pain either it doenst get easier you just learn to live with it in time.in some small way at least she isnt in pain anymore, everything happens for a reason and we may never know for a long time why. just be strong for one another right now call on someone anyone just to even lend a shoulder(or make sure that bill gets paid so ummmm … nothing gets shut off!!!!….lol) from time to time and let all the pain of the moment out dont keep it bottled up.try to remember the good times the happy times and embrace the day today for what it is and keep going forward the last thing kerrie would want is for anything to happen to any of you. dont worrie about the bed site dont worrie about apoligizing this is your time. yo9u do what you need to to get through the very tough days ahead ………….all my love thoughs prayers and positive energy to you all
Ron
family is fmaily and i consred you all here at kast my extended family. ya never need to apoligize or make anyreson to family as to why you havet been able to post anything especially right now .there isnt at least a few times a day im sure anyone here doesnt stop for a few minutes and think of kerrie and cry or have feelings of sorrow for that void in all our lives right now great or small (i know i do here ) take the time for you. and your own personal family right now.
jess
i love you, jenn.
Jen(Chris)
We love you all and will be here when you are ready. We’ll still check the site a millions times a day (some habits are hard to break). We’ll always be here to hear a story or something funny about Kerrie and heck we’ll still be here if you ever fall down in the shower again. We’ll just always be here. Family is always there..
Chris
Just for the record. I may not be there for you if you fall down in the shower. I may call somebody for you.
Aunt Jeannine
Thanks for the smile Chris, we all appreciate it. Jenn & Joan, we are all still checking the site several times a day. It’s part habit/disbelief and part longing to be there to help you through this, knowing that the only thing that will ease the pain is time… we are and will be with you.